15. Connect with Your Values

Completing this 10-minute writing exercise has been shown to improve mood, increase empathy and connection, and boost motivation to follow-through on the things you care about.

mental health, friendship, connectionJessica GiffordNovember 29, 2021Comment

14. Vent and Validate ... it makes people feel heard.

People love this simple activity. Most of us crave validation, because—let’s face it—we’re all a bit malnourished in that area. Unfortunately, the typical responses to venting can make matters worse…

mental health, relationships, connectionJessica GiffordNovember 22, 2021empathy, ventingComment

13. Remember (and use) People’s Name

Using someone’s name conveys recognition, warmth, and respect, and makes people feel seen. This practice can be used with anyone and everyone—people you’ve just met, acquaintances, and friends.

Jessica GiffordNovember 15, 2021Comment

12. Get Out of Your Head: quieting social awkwardness and anxiety

Social anxiety interferes with our ability to make connections, develop relationships, and have a satisfying social life. This strategy helps you work through it.

connection, relationship-building, relationshipsJessica GiffordNovember 8, 2021anxiety, social anxiety, social discomfortComment

11. Really Listen. Your friends will love you for it.

Giving someone your full attention and really listening is a simple, but rare, gift.

connection, friendship, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordNovember 1, 2021listening, active listeningComment

10. Start the thing you want. You can create belonging.

We all want to feel like we belong. But what if you can’t find the thing you really want to be a part of? You could be the one to start it.

connection, relationship-building, friendshipJessica GiffordOctober 19, 2021groupsComment

9. Mirror. It's a secret superpower!

Mirroring can be used to build genuine connection … or to manipulate.

communication, connection, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordOctober 18, 2021mirroring, body languageComment

8. Ask for help

If you find it difficult to ask for help, you’re not alone! But being independent is overrated—we all need support. These are some ways to ask for help and strengthen your support system.

mental health, connection, communicationJessica GiffordOctober 11, 2021ask for help, ask for support, supportComment

7. Introduce Yourself to Put People at Ease

The small act of introducing yourself—or making introductions for others—communicates friendliness, helps people feel included, and even provides a happiness boost.

communication, relationship-building, inclusionJessica GiffordOctober 4, 2021make introductionsComment

6. Ask for advice or a small favor ... and leverage the "Franklin Effect."

Many people have a hard time asking for help because they don’t want to be a burden, but asking for a small favor can make people like you more.

friendship, connection, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordSeptember 27, 2021asking for help, asking for advice

5. Ask Good Questions. It increases your likability.

Being curious and asking interesting questions is at the top of the list of what makes people likable. Here are a few questions to spark interesting conversation.

relationship-building, connection, communicationJessica GiffordSeptember 20, 2021Making conversation, ask good questionsComment

4. Ditch the "shoulds." Unrealistic social expectations will make you miserable.

Ever get down on yourself because you’re not where you think you “should” be in life? Most people struggle with this—and the issue often has more to do with your expectations than your reality.

connection, relationships, friendship, mental healthJessica GiffordSeptember 13, 2021college friendship, expectation gap, measuring upComment

3. Appreciate Differences: challenge your hidden biases

We see the world through the lens of our own experience. I’ve dubbed this “wearing you-colored glasses.” This makes us assume other people are like us, which can get in the way of seeing them for who they are, and truly connecting.

connection, relationship-building, communicationJessica GiffordSeptember 6, 2021differenceComment

2. Smile! It boosts connection

What if there were one small habit that boosts happiness, builds connection, makes people see you as more attractive, and even predicts longevity? There is … the smile!

1. Engage in acts of kindness ... it boosts happiness!

Engaging in acts of kindness (even small ones) is a nice way to give someone an unexpected mood boost—and increase your happiness at the same time.

relationship-building, connectionJessica GiffordAugust 23, 2021acts of kindness Comment

111+ Ways to Make Friends as an Adult

This blog is a collection of small action steps—based on science—to help you make closer, more fulfilling friendships.

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