The number one predictor of long-term success—in business, art, and relationships—is the amount of discomfort we’re willing to endure. This activity will help you build your awkward tolerance.

relationship-building, connection, friendshipJessica GiffordJanuary 17, 2022social discomfort, social awkwardnessComment

21. Align Your Time With Your Priorities

Most people would say family and friends are more important than anything else, but the way we spend our time doesn’t always match our priorities. Try this simple exercise to see how well your time aligns with your priorities.

connection, friendship, happinessJessica GiffordJanuary 10, 2022prioritiesComment

20. Set a social mini-goal

People often set goals that are overly ambitious, then fizzle out. Starting small, with mini-goals, will give you early success that you can build on. This strategy can be applied to any of your goals, including building stronger connection.

connection, friendship, mental health, relationshipsJessica GiffordJanuary 4, 2022goal-settingComment

19. Partner up on your goals

If you’re serious about achieving a goal, an accountability partner brings your chances of success up to 95% … and builds connection.

connection, productivity, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordDecember 27, 2021goal-settingComment

18. Let love in … it’s the cure for insecurity

In order to achieve a sense of belonging and connection, we don’t just need to BE loved, we need to FEEL loved. That means learning to let in the kindness, care, and positivity we receive.

friendship, relationships, mental health, connectionJessica GiffordDecember 20, 2021Comment

17. Be reliable. Flakiness is for pies, not people.

Being reliable may not sound sexy, but following through on commitments builds trust, which is essential to the long-term health of a friendship.

friendship, connection, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordDecember 13, 2021Comment

16. Celebrate your friends’ successes

Most people think that the strength of a friendship is based on being there through hard times, but research shows that celebrating a friend’s good news is even more important.

15. Connect with Your Values

Completing this 10-minute writing exercise has been shown to improve mood, increase empathy and connection, and boost motivation to follow-through on the things you care about.

mental health, friendship, connectionJessica GiffordNovember 29, 2021Comment

14. Vent and Validate ... it makes people feel heard.

People love this simple activity. Most of us crave validation, because—let’s face it—we’re all a bit malnourished in that area. Unfortunately, the typical responses to venting can make matters worse…

mental health, relationships, connectionJessica GiffordNovember 22, 2021empathy, ventingComment

12. Get Out of Your Head: quieting social awkwardness and anxiety

Social anxiety interferes with our ability to make connections, develop relationships, and have a satisfying social life. This strategy helps you work through it.

connection, relationship-building, relationshipsJessica GiffordNovember 8, 2021anxiety, social anxiety, social discomfortComment

11. Really Listen. Your friends will love you for it.

Giving someone your full attention and really listening is a simple, but rare, gift.

connection, friendship, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordNovember 1, 2021listening, active listeningComment

10. Start the thing that you want to join ... and create belonging

We all want to feel like we belong to something … but sometimes that something doesn’t exist. You could be the one to start it.

connection, relationship-building, friendshipJessica GiffordOctober 19, 2021groupsComment

9. Mirror. It's a secret superpower!

Mirroring can be used to build genuine connection … or to manipulate.

communication, connection, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordOctober 18, 2021mirroring, body languageComment

8. Ask for help

If you find it difficult to ask for help, you’re not alone! But being independent is overrated—we all need support. These are some ways to ask for help and strengthen your support system.

mental health, connection, communicationJessica GiffordOctober 11, 2021ask for help, ask for support, supportComment

6. Ask for advice or a small favor ... and leverage the "Franklin Effect."

Many people have a hard time asking for help because they don’t want to be a burden, but asking for a small favor can make people like you more.

friendship, connection, relationship-buildingJessica GiffordSeptember 27, 2021asking for help, asking for advice

5. Ask Good Questions. It increases your likability.

Being curious and asking interesting questions is at the top of the list of what makes people likable. Here are a few questions to spark interesting conversation.

relationship-building, connection, communicationJessica GiffordSeptember 20, 2021Making conversation, ask good questionsComment

4. Challenge social ideals. Trying to live up to them will make you miserable

Rosy ideals and unrealistic expectations about friendship often make us feel bad about ourselves when reality doesn’t match up. Here are some ideas for addressing the expectation gap.